Live the Life You Desire

A time comes when we finally awaken and start finding the "Pearls" in our life. When in the midst of all our fears and insanity, we stop dead in our tracks, and realize that it's time to stop hoping and waiting for something to change, or for happiness, safety and security to come galloping over the next horizon. We awaken to the fact that we are not perfect, that not everyone will always love, appreciate, or approve of who or what we are, and that's okay. (They're entitled to their own views and opinions.) And we learn the importance of loving and championing ourselves; and in the process a sense of new-found confidence is born of self-approval.

We learn that people don't always say what they mean or mean what they say, and sometimes they don't even know themselves. We also learn that not everyone will always be there for us; and that it's not always about us. So, we learn to stand on our own, and to take care of ourselves, and in the process, a sense of safety and security is born of self-reliance.

We stop judging and pointing fingers and we begin to accept people as they are, and to overlook their shortcomings and human frailties; and in the process, a sense of peace and contentment is born. We realize that much of the way we view ourselves and the world around us, is as a result of all the messages and opinions that have been ingrained into our psyche.

We begin to sift through all that we've been fed about how we should behave, how we should look, and how much we should weigh; what we should wear and where we should shop, and what we should drive; how and where we should live, and what we should do for a living; who we should sleep with, who we should marry, and what we should expect of a marriage; the importance of having and raising children, or what we owe our parents. We learn to open up to new worlds and different points of view. And we begin reassessing and redefining who we are and what we really stand for.

We learn that we don't know everything, it's not our job to save the world and that we can't teach a cat to sing. We learn to distinguish between guilt, and responsibility, and the importance of setting boundaries, and learning to say NO. We learn that the only cross to bear is the one we choose to carry. We learn to look at relationships as they really are and not as we would have them be. We stop trying to control people, situations, and outcomes.

We look in the mirror and come to terms with the fact that we will never be a perfect size, and we stop trying to compete with the image inside our head and agonizing over how we "stack up." We stop working so hard at putting our feelings aside, smoothing things over and ignoring our needs; and we come to the realization that we deserve to be treated with love, kindness, sensitivity, and respect.

We learn that fatigue diminishes the spirit and can create doubt and fear. So we take more time to rest. And, just as food fuels the body, laughter fuels our soul,and crying cleans our hurts. Suppressing our hurt makes us weak. It's OK to cry; it's a form of releasing our hurt, after we feel the fullness of our hurt, we will grow strong again.

So we take more time to laugh and to play. We learn that for the most part, in life we get what we believe we deserve and that much of life truly is a self-fulfilling prophecy. We learn that anything worth achieving is worth working for, and that wishing for something to happen is different from working toward making it happen. More importantly, we learn that in order to achieve success we need direction, discipline, and perseverance.

We also learn that no one can do it all alone and that it's OK to risk asking for help. We learn that the only thing we must truly fear is the great robber baron of all time, fear itself. We learn to step right into and through our fears because we know that whatever happens we can handle it, and to give in to fear is to give away the right to live life on our terms.

And we learn to fight for our life and not to squander it living under a cloud of impending doom. We learn that life isn't always fair, we don't always get what we think we deserve; and that sometimes-bad things happen to unsuspecting, good people. On these occasions, we learn not to personalize things.

We begin to take responsibility for our actions. And we learn to deal with evil in its most primal state - the ego. We learn negative feelings such as anger, envy and resentment must be understood and redirected, or they will suffocate the life out of us, and poison the universe that surrounds us. We learn to admit when we are wrong and to build bridges instead of walls.

We learn to be thankful and to take comfort in many of the simple things we take for granted, things that millions of people upon the earth can only dream about: a full refrigerator, clean running water, a soft warm bed, a long hot shower. Slowly, we begin to take responsibility for ourselves; and we make ourselves a promise to never betray ourselves and to never settle for less than our heart's desire.

And we hang a wind chime outside our window so we can listen to the wind. And we make it a point to keep smiling, keep trusting, and to stay open to every wonderful possibility.

Finally, with courage in our heart and with Spirit by our side, we take a stand, for we have found one of life's most important "Pearls" ... we take a deep breath and ... we begin to design the life that WE want to live.

Author Unknown
Contributed by Denys in Santa Fe, New Mexico