Like Yourself to Open Up to Others

From an article in the The Register-Guard, Eugene, Oregon:

"Our ability to be open rests on how well we like ourselves as we are, regardless of what other people think. If we don't know and care about ourselves, we can't open up to letting others know and care about us. That means we can't be vulnerable if we never take the time to find out - and appreciate - who we really are.

In treatment centers, we deal with this issue every day. Usually, by the time people seek our services, they have built some pretty thick walls. They don't want to let anybody in. Many experienced abuse as children, so they have long since lost their willingness to trust anyone.

Often, they experience self-hatred. We regularly see them express a strong need to be right all the time, and a posture of "I'll get them before they get me." They say they don't care what others think - and they've often acted that way - but they're actually extremely concerned with the opinions of others.

In a way, alcoholics and addicts fear being vulnerable in healthy ways, while making themselves vulnerable in unhealthy ways. Our job is to help patients reverse that pattern, and the techniques we use in treatment can be used by anyone who wants an authentic, appropriately vulnerable life - with the freedom and intimacy that comes with it."

Via dryblog